I have been recently trying to help several friends who are suffering and who are trying to understand why they are suffering physically, financially, and/or emotionally. I know that most people are probably suffering in some respect. The important questions are “How are you dealing with it?,” “Are you feeling or acting like a victim?,” “Are you doing something to make your situation better?,” and “Are you trusting God in your situation?”

Exactly how these questions are answered not only depends on the actual hardship you are experiencing but also on how you are responding to your hardship. I don’t believe anyone goes through life without experiencing some kind of hardship, but how we view our hardship can affect how we respond to it, our witness, our relationship with God, and sometimes how long and badly we suffer.

One of the best examples of the proper response to hardship comes from Job. Within minutes, he got notified that he had lost all of his children and his animals (wealth). How did he respond?

Then Job got up, tore his robe, and shaved his head; then he fell to the ground and worshiped. He said,

“Naked I came from my mother’s womb, And naked I shall return there. The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away. Blessed be the name of the Lord.” (Job 1:20-21)

He mourned the loss like we all would, but he also immediately fell to the ground and worshiped God. He acknowledged God had the right to both give and take away, and that God should be blessed and worshiped in all situations. Have you done the same, or do you act like God has wronged you by taking away your health, your wealth, your reputation, or something else? Are you able to worship God even when it feels like your life and livelihood are falling apart? None of this is easy. We all fail at this sometimes. The big question is: do you dwell on how everything is going wrong and how unfair it is, or do you focus on God, His goodness, and His plan? Do you cry out, “Why me? Why do you help others, but not me?” or do you ask, “What do you want me to learn?” or “How do I need to respond for your glory?”

How we orient our thoughts lead to a good outcome or a bad outcome. (Keep in mind that good and bad are determined by God on an eternal timeline and not based on our current comfort or what we personally desire.) We need to focus our minds on the things of God and not on our hardships.

Therefore, if you have been raised with Christ, keep seeking the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on the things that are above, not on the things that are on earth. (Colossians 3:1-2) {emphasis mine}

When trying to help one friend, who was experiencing major health and financial hardship, I was originally thinking that I had never experienced anything similar. After our conversation, I realized I had. I just hadn’t viewed it in the same way. I went through about 3 years when my youngest had severe health problems and was hospitalized so many times I lost count. He was on constant oxygen for approximately 3 years. I didn’t get into a deep sleep for those 3 years because I was always listening intently for a hint of breathing problems and the need to rush to the hospital.
I then had about a decade in which my health was so bad that some days I could barely sit up. I was unable to do much of my necessary responsibilities and had zero energy for things I should do or would like to do.
During about 5 years of this period, our business also suffered, partially due to the economy and partially due to neglect. We would go ~6 months each year unable to cash our paychecks because there was not enough cash in the bank to pay them and our business losing tens of thousands or even more than $100,000 each year.

This period was very hard, but it never crossed my mind to question God’s goodness or love. I never felt like a victim. Many people experience health problems. Why should I expect to avoid them? Many people experience financial problems. Why should I be saved from them? What I saw was God teaching me to rest in Him. I learned that I can’t do it all myself and that I sometimes have to ask for help, especially from God. I grew closer to God. I grew in my faith. As hard as that stage of life was, I wouldn’t change it. If I had not experienced this difficult stage of life, I wouldn’t have the faith I have now, and I wouldn’t lean on God as much.

I also went through another year or two of severe hardship. First, our hot water heat pipes froze, burst, and flooded our entire downstairs, leading to about 9 months of fighting with insurance to do the repairs while having the entire downstairs flood-cut and our stuff piled in heaps off the floor. After finally getting a lawyer, they settled for 90% of the cost of repairs. We switched insurance companies and ten days later, our house burnt down in a 60+ mph wind-fueled grass fire that vaporized everything in the house. Based on the melting temperatures of metals, we estimate the interior of the house reached at least 1800°F. A month later, my husband’s car engine blew up and had to be replaced. A month after that, my husband ruptured his Achilles tendon and he had to have surgery, ruining our plans to visit family for Christmas. A month after that, my husband got blood clots in his legs and he had to give himself blood thinning shots in his stomach twice a day for a couple of weeks.

This also was hard, but God used the flood to cause us to switch insurance companies, so we would have good insurance that, after the fire, quickly paid for a whole new house and a year’s rent while we were rebuilding. The house burning down caused us to move temporarily to a house where we could take care of my husband much easier because the sleeping and living areas were close together and on one floor, unlike the house that burnt down. The insurance settlement money was available to add to the money for rebuilding, so when all was finished we had a better house (including a very fire resistant exterior) and it was completely paid off. As hard as the year+ was, not one member of my family would avoid it if given the opportunity to go back in time. We were blessed beyond belief.

Many people would go through a situation like this and wonder why God was punishing them so much. The truth is that this hardship was a blessing. It grew our faith. It provided for our needs. It has been a great witness to those around us. What most outsiders would consider a curse was actually the greatest blessing of our lives after salvation. God is good all the time.

We all sometimes have a hard time seeing God’s goodness because we view the here and now instead of eternity. We see comfort/discomfort and ease/difficulty. God sees growth/stagnation and dependence on/independence from Him. God gives us what we need instead of what we want because He knows what is more important eternally.

This doesn’t mean it is easy, but we need to train our minds to focus on the things of God and to be thankful for what we have instead of what we don’t have.

These things I have spoken to you so that in Me you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33)

One of the best ways to train our minds to dwell on the things of God is to give thanks. There is a reason that the Bible constantly tells us to give thanks.

Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good, For His mercy is everlasting. (Psalm 107:1)

and

Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God for you in Christ Jesus. (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18)

What great advice!

• Rejoice always – Yes, we need to rejoice even in suffering because we know that God gives us what we need, not necessarily what we want.
• Pray without ceasing – Prayer (talking with God) needs to be a continual part of our lives. Sometimes we will pray alone in a long, deep pouring out of our heart. Sometimes we will join with other believers to share our needs, concerns, and thanks. Sometimes we are in a hard spot and just throw up a short “Help me, Jesus!” because we don’t have the time, energy, or words to explain our needs, knowing that God knows all things and always gives good gifts to His children.
• In everything give thanks – This means we not only need to look for and thank God for the obvious blessings in our life, but we also need to thank God for the hardship, knowing they bring about good things.

Consider it all joy, my brothers and sisters, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. (James 1:2-4)

Trials can cause blessings if we let them, if we trust God instead of condemning Him.

*FYI, I want to say that God wants us to be honest. We shouldn’t pretend that we aren’t hurting or that we aren’t having doubts. We shouldn’t try to hide that we don’t understand and feel hurt. There is nothing wrong with pouring out your heart to God when you are suffering. The problem comes not from an honest prayer, but when we dwell on the hardship and the questions instead of focusing on God’s goodness, the word of God, and thanksgiving. All of us will have doubts, questions, and needs, but that isn’t where our mind should remain. We need to turn our thoughts to God and the things of God. We need to focus on heavenly and eternal things rather than momentary and earthly things. *

We are destroying arguments and all arrogance raised against the knowledge of God, and we are taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ, (2 Corinthians 10:5) {emphasis mine}

When your mind starts to repeat that your situation is unfair or when you think only about what you don’t have and not about the blessings God has given you, i.e. salvation and God’s love, then you need to take those thoughts captive and turn to “rejoicing always,” “praying without ceasing,” and “giving thanks in everything.”

Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things. (Philippians 4:8)

We need to set our minds on what is honorable, right, pure, lovely, of good repute, excellent, and praiseworthy. We need to focus on the things of God. We need to dwell on the heavenly things that will last and not on our momentary afflictions.

Let the peace of Christ, to which you were indeed called in one body, rule in your hearts; and be thankful. Let the word of Christ richly dwell within you, with all wisdom teaching and admonishing one another with psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs, singing with thankfulness in your hearts to God. Whatever you do in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through Him to God the Father. (Colossians 3:15-17)

There are many good things to do mentioned in this passage, but also notice that it says, “with all wisdom teaching and admonishing one another with psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs, singing with thankfulness in your hearts to God.” Notice the phrase “one another.” We are not to endure hardship alone. God has given us the body of Christ. We are not to forsake meeting together. We are to meet together and build each other up. We are to support each other. We should not be experiencing hardship alone.

My husband and I are part of a small group Bible study. We officially meet together to study the Bible and learn about God, but we probably spend more time sharing our concerns and praying for each other. We have people in our small group with cancer, with unsaved children, with adult children so sick they can’t function, and with various other health problems from inconvenient to debilitating. We support each other in prayer, encouragement, and meeting physical needs where we can.

It is so common for people who are suffering to feel alone and like they are the only one who is suffering. They don’t want to share their hardships, but they also don’t want to pretend that nothing is wrong, so they feel like they have to withdraw from the body of Christ. This is not the answer. You don’t need to hide that you are suffering. You don’t have to answer the question, “How are you doing?” with “fine.” It is true that not everyone who asks, “How are you?” wants to hear the whole truth, but in the body of Christ, most should be willing. Those around you can’t help you or encourage you if they don’t know what you are going through.

It seems so counterintuitive to celebrate hardship, but that is what we are called to do.

Therefore, having been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we also have obtained our introduction by faith into this grace in which we stand; and we celebrate in hope of the glory of God. And not only this, but we also celebrate in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope; and hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us. (Romans 5:1-5) {emphasis mine}

Notice what tribulation brings about:

• perseverance
• proven character
• hope

Our hardships are not just random harm. They are an opportunity to grow and become more like Jesus. They are an opportunity to shine the light of Jesus on a weary and suffering world. Have you ever looked at your hardships as an opportunity? Viewing hardship this way truly requires a change of heart and mind from our old sin-nature. Only through salvation from Jesus and the help of the Holy Spirit can we view things from an eternal perspective and view hardship as an opportunity. If you haven’t trusted Jesus as Savior, you won’t be able to brute force your way into this thought pattern, but if you have trusted Jesus, it is possible, but you have to keep your focus on Jesus. How do we do this?

• Pray continually
• Read the Bible
• Meditate on God’s Word
• Give thanks in all things
• Listen to uplifting, God-focused music, podcasts, and sermons
• Spend time with godly, encouraging believers
• Serve others who are also suffering
• Praise God for all He has done and who He is

Having been through times where it was difficult to sit up, eat, provide for my family, etc., I understand that we can have moments where we get frustrated, but every time we feel the frustration and doubt welling up, turn to Jesus.

Therefore we do not lose heart, but though our outer person is decaying, yet our inner person is being renewed day by day. For our momentary, light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory far beyond all comparison, while we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen; for the things which are seen are temporal, but the things which are not seen are eternal. (2 Corinthians 4:16-18) {emphasis mine}

Can you consider your hardship as a “momentary, light affliction?” That is a point of view that only comes through abiding in Christ. When we know what a good, all-powerful, loving God we serve, we can see the benefits we receive even when our earthly situation is abysmal. When we keep our eye on the end result (an eternity of peace and joy with our Creator and Savior in heaven where there is no more crying and pain), we can see beyond the pain and see the joy that is to come. It is amazing how much pain we can endure when we can see an end to the pain and can see the benefit in the future. Just as a mother can joyfully endure labor because of the blessing of a new baby, so also we can endure the labor of our earthly life because of the blessing of our eternal life to come.

Let’s not become discouraged in doing good, for in due time we will reap, if we do not become weary. (Galatians 6:9)

Having an eternal, godly perspective changes how we view the things of this world. It also helps us to endure hardship that lasts an extended period.

But remember the former days, when, after being enlightened, you endured a great conflict of sufferings, partly by being made a public spectacle through insults and distress, and partly by becoming companions with those who were so treated. For you showed sympathy to the prisoners and accepted joyfully the seizure of your property, knowing that you have for yourselves a better and lasting possession. Therefore, do not throw away your confidence, which has a great reward. For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God, you may receive what was promised. (Hebrews 10:32-35) {emphasis mine}

Only with an eternal perspective can we accept “joyfully the seizure of your property, knowing that you have for yourselves a better and lasting possession.” This change in heart and mind can change our opinion of our hardship from being the greatest curse to the greatest blessing without a change in circumstances.

I don’t want to make light of how difficult this is to do. Without Jesus, it is impossible, but with Jesus all things are possible. God wants you to trust Him, to abide in Him, to follow Him, and to glorify Him. Your hardship can either strengthen your relationship with the Almighty or cause you to withdraw from Him. Make sure you turn to Him and abide in Him. Make sure you align your heart and mind with His. Make sure you fill your mind with truth from the Bible, so you can view your circumstances the way God does.

I also want to encourage those going through hardship. Yes, there are some hardships that result from our choices. There are negative consequences of sin. Sometimes a person suffers financial hardship because they refuse to work or because they won’t accept the job they can get because they are too focused on another job that they desire. Sometimes a person has poor health because of their food choices, alcohol/drug choices, or lack of exercise. In these cases, sometimes changing the way you live will fix the problem. On the other hand, there are many circumstances where we suffer through no fault of our own. We didn’t sin. We made all the right choices, but we still suffer (see the story of Joseph as an example). If this is honestly the case, do not let the uninformed tell you that you are suffering because of your sin or lack of faith.

Job’s friends accused him of horrid sins because they thought all suffering was due to sin. God judged them for their error and blessed Job for his faithfulness (admittedly, after a little correction of Job’s thoughts, as well). Neither Job, nor his friends realized what was happening in the spiritual realm. God was proving Job’s faithfulness, not punishing him for sins he had committed.

Jesus’s disciples saw a blind man and asked Jesus about him, assuming the man’s blindness was because of someone’s sin.

As Jesus passed by, He saw a man who had been blind from birth. And His disciples asked Him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he would be born blind?” Jesus answered, “It was neither that this man sinned, nor his parents; but it was so that the works of God might be displayed in him. (John 9:1-3) {emphasis mine}

This man was born blind, so God could be glorified and so many people could see the mighty works of Jesus and be saved. There was a major good that came of this hardship, but it couldn’t be seen for many years, nor could it be seen by everyone around it.

Too often we are distraught in our hardship because we have been told the lie that everyone who truly trusts in Jesus will be blessed. There are many teachers promising blessings on earth to everyone who has enough faith, but that is not what the Bible says. Yes, we are promised blessings, but we aren’t promised blessings here on earth. We are promised trials. We rarely grow in our faith or faithfulness during blessings. We grow the most when we go through hardship.

Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal among you, which comes upon you for your testing, as though something strange were happening to you; but to the degree that you share the sufferings of Christ, keep on rejoicing, so that at the revelation of His glory you may also rejoice and be overjoyed. (1 Peter 4:12-13) {emphasis mine}

We are told not to be surprised by our suffering, but to rejoice in it and even to be overjoyed. I don’t know that it is easy for any of us to be overjoyed in suffering, but it is possible in Jesus. We also need to remember how much Jesus suffered for us. Is it unreasonable for us to suffer for our God, Creator, and Savior who suffered and died for us?

One of the lies of the devil is to tell people that their prayers for healing or help are not answered because they don’t have enough faith. Paul, who wrote more than half of the New Testament, said this:

Because of the extraordinary greatness of the revelations, for this reason, to keep me from exalting myself, there was given to me a thorn in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to torment me—to keep me from exalting myself! Concerning this I pleaded with the Lord three times that it might leave me. And He has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.” Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me. Therefore I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in distresses, in persecutions, in difficulties, in behalf of Christ; for when I am weak, then I am strong. (2 Corinthians 12:7-10) {emphasis mine}

Paul prayed for healing, but was told that he would not be healed. God told Paul, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.” Paul not only accepted God’s grace as being sufficient, but said, “Therefore I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in distresses, in persecutions, in difficulties, in behalf of Christ; for when I am weak, then I am strong.” He delighted in his weakness, insults, distresses, persecution, and difficulties. None of those sound particularly delightful, but in Christ and on behalf of Christ they can be. Most importantly, he said, “When I am weak, then I am strong.” We need to remember that when we are weak, God can use us in His strength.

God has a habit of using those who are weak or a small, weak group to do great things. Moses said of himself, “Please, Lord, I have never been eloquent, neither recently nor in time past, nor since You have spoken to Your servant; for I am slow of speech and slow of tongue.” (Exodus 4:10) and yet God used him to tell Pharaoh to let His people go and to teach God’s people His laws and to lead them to the promised land. God used Gideon and 300 men to overthrow Midian, the oppressors of Israel. Originally when Gideon gathered an army, there were too many people. “And the Lord said to Gideon, “The people who are with you are too many for Me to hand Midian over to them, otherwise Israel would become boastful, saying, ‘My own power has saved me.’” (Judges 7:2)

There are so many other examples. Sometimes God humbles us, so He can use us for great things. The very situation that causes us to say, “Why me?” is the thing that makes us useful to God and allows us to do great things through Him.

Whether God is using your hardship to mold you into the person you need to be, as a witness to others, or so He can use you to accomplish great things, we need to trust God.

Not that I speak from need, for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am. I know how to get along with little, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need. I can do all things through Him who strengthens me. (Philippians 4:11-13) {emphasis mine}

As you go through various trials. Hold firmly to this verse:

I can do all things through Him who strengthens me. (Philippians 4:13)

Please join me in this prayer.

May the Lord of Heaven guide me in truth and contentment in whatever circumstances He places me. May He use me for His glory in whatever way He chooses. May He help me see His plan for my life and the reason for my suffering, but may He strengthen my faith even without knowledge of His plan. May I follow Him through trials with my heart and mind firmly fixed on eternity with Him.

Trust Jesus

If you do not yet know Jesus, I beg you to trust in Him. Below are some verses that will tell you what you need to know to be saved. If you have any questions, I’d love to answer them. Just message me on Substack.

for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, (Romans 3:23)

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For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 6:23)

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But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. (Romans 5:8)

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that if you confess with your mouth Jesus as Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved; (Romans 10:9)

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If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say that we have not sinned, we make Him a liar and His word is not in us. (1 John 1:9-10)

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For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 8:38-39)

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He made Him who knew no sin to be sin on our behalf, so that we might become the righteousness of God in Him. (2 Corinthians 5:21)

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But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, even to those who believe in His name, who were born, not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man, but of God. (John 1:12-13)

All verses are NASB unless otherwise noted.