I was recently reading in Joshua and read this passage:

For if you ever go back and cling to the rest of these nations, these which remain among you, and intermarry with them, so that you associate with them and they with you, know with certainty that the Lord your God will not continue to drive these nations out from before you; but they will be a snare and a trap to you, and a whip on your sides and thorns in your eyes, until you perish from off this good land which the Lord your God has given you. (Joshua 23:12-13) {emphasis mine}

This made me think about how we are influenced by those with whom we spend the most time. Are our closest friends strong believers or are they unbelievers? Maybe our closest friends claim to be believers, but live not much differently than unbelievers. When you hang out with your friends, do they draw you closer to God or distract you from God?

FYI, as important as it is that you surround yourself with faithful believers, this does not mean you should isolate yourself from unbelievers. My next post will be on the error that is the reverse of the one I am addressing in this post.

With whom we spend most of our time matters immensely. This is especially important when we consider who will be family, business partners, and other close relationships.

Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness? Or what harmony has Christ with Belial, or what has a believer in common with an unbeliever? Or what agreement has the temple of God with idols? For we are the temple of the living God; just as God said, “I will dwell in them and walk among them; And I will be their God, and they shall be My people. Therefore, come out from their midst and be separate,” says the Lord. “And do not touch what is unclean; And I will welcome you. And I will be a father to you, And you shall be sons and daughters to Me,” Says the Lord Almighty. (2 Corinthians 6:14-18) {emphasis mine}

When we become bound to an unbeliever through marriage, business partnership, or any other relationship that ties two or more people together, there is a pull to serve the wants/needs of the partner. If that person is an unbeliever, they likely have ungodly desires and plans. To please them or to stop conflict with them, we will be tempted to go along to get along. If that person is a believer who is faithfully following God, then it is easier to work together in faithfulness to God. We are less likely to be led astray.

There are multiple common sayings about becoming like those with whom you spend your time:

• “Show me your friends and I’ll show you your future.”.
• “You become like the five people you spend the most time with. Choose carefully.” – Jim Rohn.
• “You are the company you keep.”.​
• “Bad company corrupts good character.” – from ancient Greek wisdom, quoted widely today.​

These aren’t Scripture, but they are common adages because there is truth in them. If you spend most of your time with strong believers, you are more likely to grow in your faith. If you spend most of your time with unbelievers, you are more likely to drift away and follow the current of the culture.

What do you do if you have already married an unbeliever (or became a believer after marrying an unbeliever) or you already have an unbelieving business partner?

But to the rest I say, not the Lord, that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he must not divorce her. And a woman who has an unbelieving husband, and he consents to live with her, she must not send her husband away. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified through her believing husband; for otherwise your children are unclean, but now they are holy. Yet if the unbelieving one leaves, let him leave; the brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us to peace. (1 Corinthians 7:12-15)

This general guideline not to be bound to an unbeliever does not mean that a Christian should break a contract, covenant, or promise unless the unbeliever breaks it first. When God makes a promise, He keeps it, and so should we.

If you are in this situation, it is even more important that you find some Christian believers to spend time with, to encourage you, to hold you accountable, and whom you can encourage.

Jesus clearly tells believers they will experience hard times.

These things I have spoken to you, so that in Me you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33)

One reason to surround yourself with fellow believers is to encourage and lift each other up during trials and tribulations. It is much easier to stand firm when surrounded by fellow believers than when standing alone.

Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up. Furthermore, if two lie down together they keep warm, but how can one be warm alone? And if one can overpower him who is alone, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart. (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12)

Our primary support should be God, but the encouragement and correction that comes from other faithful believers will help us stand firm on the Word of God and to not be misled by the current of culture that is constantly trying to drag us away from Jesus.

We need others to help us to stand firm, but we also need to help others to stand. We all have moments of weakness and areas of weakness. We all have areas of strength. Together we are more likely to stay faithful.

and let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds, not forsaking our own assembling together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another; and all the more as you see the day drawing near. (Hebrews 10:24-25)

May God guide you to fellow Christians who will encourage you in love and good works and whom you can encourage as well. May He guide you to those who can guide you in the way of our Lord and guide you to those whom you can guide. May you never forsake the meeting together, so that the body of Christ may be one in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Trust Jesus

All verses are NASB unless otherwise noted.

All verses are NASB unless otherwise noted.