Firstly, this image is scary because I look just like my Jamaican grandma in spirit.

Secondly, why am I thirty-seven years old, feeling like I should probably start to collect my pension and join a senior citizens support group?

Ever since I was a teenager, specifically15 years old. I was fascinated by people in their 30s. Noticing you could never really tell their age, some look in their 20s, some look in their 40s. The 30s was just a range of such variety that I always remained intrigued.

My science teacher was hot, that’s the truth! He was 34 and so was my cousin, yet they had no comparative qualities based on age. So whilst I gave him red apples at the start of every class possible (not a metaphor). I pondered my 30s and wondered what I would look like. Always hopeful that I had the genes to see me through this lifetime.

Now, fast forward 22 years and some heartache, trauma, several dark nights of the soul, all wrapped in psychological and spiritual warfare.

THIRTY SEVEN hits different!

Especially in comparison to 33, even 35 had a kick to it. Yet, I wake up at 37, hobble to the bathroom with a grumpy moody demeanour, bitching at the cats again for not adhering to my strict regulations of OCD Feng Shui. Bending’s a bitch, Yogas in the trash, coffee is compulsory, sluggish is a natural temperament. So as I dive into a Tai Chi flow inspired by an Asian lady in her 60s. I ask myself what the fuck happened to me?

The truth is, I know full well I’ve been pinned down by the BLOCKCHAIN, imprisoned by the QUBIT. Contorted by the POLYMERS and crippled by DECENTRALISATION. Old and crusty by default!

But is this normal..? Is the question that plays on repeat in my mind, ironic AF because normative isn’t really something I fucks with, but what the fuck happened to me?

So as I google middle age to find out if I’m there yet, I ponder what’s next for HER?

Can my body bounce back, can my vinyasa flow return, can I bring sexy back?

I have full awareness that the MILF genre on Pornhub has been up +1000 year on year, so I’m set for life if needs be but I mean, my goodness. Is there more for me before retirement?

Can my Kundalini rise like it did in my 20s.

Can my wobbly bits be toned?

Can my breast rest in a underwired bra without a sudden bizarre need to free the nipple?

Can I sprint again instead of jog?

Can I power walk without looking like an ancient artefact?

As it dawns on me my speedy ability to outpace others in the field (forest specific) is sealed by the crust and dust of my late 30s.

What’s next..?

Humour aside, I’m graceful, I glide, take life in my stride but I should probably have more pride in my aging process and stress less about the business and boundaries i’ve set. Feel free to sweat and bet on my body more than my mind and find soul alignment at this trying time.

Before I hit 40 I’m going to have to retort me, return to being sporty, support me and my physical. Consciously choose to move in ways that don’t enslave me to an age beyond my time. It’s just interesting that I don’t find shine in the old things that used to fill me with light. I could have a picnic but it would be in spite of the need and demand of my future self.

I developed a whole new concept of health is wealth and my health has been tethered to the healing of text, the script and the code, the mesh and the node. Whilst my bones crack frequently on the open road.

So this is just a message a tale of time, that all of us must realign, find balance and restore what’s missing.

Instead of outwardly hissing about the things we cannot do, about the time we can’t renew.

What can we do today, right now to improve are health?

What is are current, future conceptualisations of health is wealth?

What can we do to start to build stealth, so the next 22 years are not filled with tears, fractures or matters beyond are control?

Do you too believe that we can regenerate, re-sprout with stronger roots in tow?

Restore, renew, feel brand new, undo the aging that’s connected to how we are currently behaving?

Remove the enslavement of time and define our next steps by betting on us?

Do you have trust?

What is an anti-aging must?