You cannot awaken without grief. 

I so rarely use the word ‘awaken’ but it feels really important to speak to the human evolution of consciousness specifically with this topic as I don’t think the connection is as obvious.

We are meant to wake up. We are meant to remember our divinity and the access we have to magic.

Yes, us regular ole human beings have access to magic. Like multidimensional, fairy tale, movie style magic.

Muggles are just those who haven’t realized it yet. Or, who choose not to believe it ;)

I remember spending a lot of time wishing I was magic as a kid. I was never one of those kids who could just easily see beyond the veil. There were experiences I had but they quickly got locked away and I very much muggled my way through most of my life. 

But I think at our core, most of us crave the magic we read about and see in movies because it stirs a deep remembrance of what is really possible. 

We want to make things to instantaneously appear. 

We want to time travel.

Talk to our dead loved ones.

We want to live in a world where anything is possible. 

Most of our technological advances have been created to give the appearance of magic in the 3D world.

And in many ways, it’s been incredible. The way we can connect with people around the world now. The things of beauty and service we can create. 

But I believe we are getting to a tipping point where we are being dazzled by magic mimicry instead of actually REMEMBERING what we can do. And if we continue to try and bypass the real access point to our magic by building things that simply pacify what we think we want, we’re going to really mess with humanity.

One of the key ingredients to our awakening is grief. 

We cannot remember without it.

It is an essential way in. 

There are many ways it touches us on the awakening journey but I want to speak to this particular thread. 

Grief is the felt experience of holding love with nowhere to put it and no one else to acknowledge it. The acknowledgement of truth in a way that only we can feel in that moment. A sacred remembrance. 

I think it’s hard to talk about grief because that word alone is coded in a way that is untrue.

If you had asked me about it a few years ago, I would have told you grief was this knife in your chest agony that you feel when you miss someone. It’s a wallowing and sadness that you can’t shake. 

But that is not it.

I think grief shows up in there, I think grief is more pure. It is a clean cracking to allow more in.

When it comes to people, it is our heart opening to the truth of Love that exists in that energetic connection. It’s painful to our human heart because in that moment we must hold it alone. The physical representation of that person is not there, and yet, our heart can feel it so incredibly powerfully. 

Which invites us to acknowledge the higher truth. 

Which is that they are never gone. 

And in that opening, we bring a higher dimensional experience right into our human bodies.

Awakening. 

It is a moment to moment evolution. 

Where we are brought to our knees and then given exactly what we need to remember we are much more than this human body and mind. 

I felt this deeply last year watching the Celine Dion documentary and missing my grandmother greatly. My grandmother died of ALS so witnessing the moments Celine Dion was unable to move brought me back to my grandmother’s experience. She was a woman who, when she passed, I did not have the capacity to connect with and feel her as deeply as I do today. I was numbed out to life, avoiding the truth of many things. Even my memories of that time are faded because I wasn’t very present.

As I watched the show, I felt the pain of that realization and I wished she was there. I wished I could ask her questions and tell her how amazed I am with the way she stood for justice and truth when it was inconvenient. I wished I could tell her that I see her. 

And then, cracked open and crying, I asked for her. 

Immediately a warm presence came over me. She came. Turning the sadness into the most beautiful full body knowing of truth. That she is never gone. I sat with her, letting the warmth move through my whole body. I let myself feel her. Love her. It was that moment that I could feel all the love I didn’t have the ability to feel 8 years ago. And I knew she was feeling it too. 

That is magic. 

That is my divinity opening. 

And that is only possible with grief. 

The allowance of it always allows us to access a higher dimensional understanding. 

Anything that we do or create to avoid it, is also blocking our access to Love.

We are pacifying instead of letting ourselves have the beautiful crumble opening to the magic. 

Which is what being human is all about. 

So as AI tools continue to get invented to allow people to stay “connected” to loved ones who have died or are simply not in their lives anymore, I think about how it’s not just weird and a bit fucked up - it’s actually blocking our awakening as humans. 

Everything we want, we have the technology for in our bodies. It may not look or feel what our egos think it should look or feel like- but in every experience I’ve had, it’s 100x better. 

It is the fact that it requires our surrender to feel it that makes it so damn magical. 

And that is what I am here for.